WP_000079I do love this time of year, the pretty purple flowers of the Jacaranda have fallen (all over my car) and the shops are filled with people rushing about to save the Global Financial Crisis, one purchase at a time. Our house is decked out with tacky Christmas Palace extraordinaire style. Christmas carols play over and over on the radio, and the poor shop staff get to listen to them in mass concentration all day as well.

But something that I find interestingly challenging each year, is the extended family Christmas get togethers. The standard LemonadeStandquestions always come up, so how’s work, what do you do these days? And although I absolutely love what I am lucky enough to do each day for “work” at Microsoft as Developer Evangelist – its sometimes a tad hard to explain to dear old Great Aunt Dottie.

I have been known to suggest I am a customer service representative, trainer, assistant, event organiser and even occasionally Motivation speaker (all things I do actually do as part of my day to day work) .

This year I decided I needed something new as my Faux Career. So as I always like to do when I can’t decide on something, I thought I would ask the great and wise Twitter Collective (my Brains Trust).

Turns out, many other people have Faux Careers they use in this & similar situations, and to be honest the suggestions I received were so entertaining, varied and plentiful, I decided I needed to collate them into a list.

I would also like to point out that it seems that there is a full range of Faux Careers for all kinds of situations, ranging from the Ridiculous, to more the believable.

Feel free to add more in the comments or use as required for your own entertainment!

The 2010 Faux Career List

  • dolphin trainer
  • god
  • flight attendant
  • Librarian
  • cosmonaut
  • fries guy/gal at Maccas (feel free to mention you sometimes get to wear the Drive through mic)
  • lion tamer
  • Aeroplane washer
  • truck flourisher
  • tugboat captain
  • travelling salesman
  • coffee bean sizer
  • traffic light color inspector
  • quality control manager at Arnott's
  • a sleeper agent on a special mission and that they shouldn't sleep on 22nd Feb 2011...
  • Wing Deicer (apparently the person who drives the robot to get the ice off plane wings)
  • Underwater Ceramics Technician (has been argued if this is actually a dishwasher, or a Pool cleaner?)
  • Bus stop graffiti grammar checker
  • stablehand that shovels horse poopWP_000102
  • Microsoft Shrink Wrapper
  • Gigolo
  • Carbonologist.
  • missionary
  • champagne dealer
  • developer/programmer.
  • chief champagne tester for Veuve
  • bond girl
  • Tax Lawyer
  • corporate lawyer for a tobacco company

I have to admit that as I sit here, and look out at the tug boats, I think this Christmas, when Great Aunt Dottie asks, I am going to say I am a Tug Boat Captain!!! Smile 

Thanks for the entertaining suggestions from  @angusbooker, @aperebus@damana, @jodiem, @rioter, @agkdesign, @shiftkey, @misswired, @tuna, @David_Cook, @crazzysyfen, @zbender, @alexmathewson, @creepyed, @uglybugger, @pixel8ted, @lachlanhardy, @dukeofWinbourne, @rog42

Have a Safe & Merry Christmas!