Motivation
What makes a person do what they do? One thing we try to be at Microsoft (and another good attribute to have) is self-critical- to be able to objectively [to the best of our innate abilities,as it is hard to avoid some subjectivity in this domain] analyze our actions, our strengths, our weaknesses- in many aspects of our work.
Two other key parts of the Microsoft culture that bear upon this article, and which is in some sense motivated by a nexus of all of these: the intrinsic value of open and honest communication, and a sense of respect to others with whom we deal that tries to assume the best interpretation when multiple alternatives present themselves.
The final element in today's mix is some of my own motivators- to blog, to work on WDF, and to work for Microsoft. I'll start with the final one.
Microsoft is an amazing place to work. The Core Operating Systems Division- the heart and soul of a platform literally used on a global basis. I was a part of it years ago [and it was a thrill to be there then, when it was the Systems Division, and Steve Ballmer was just the president of the division], and to be back there again- at a place close to the kernel, which is a place I'd always hoped to be but doubted I'd ever achieve. Those bottom-most layers, where hardware meets software- the foundation that holds up the entire software building. I should pinch myself to make sure it's really true.
But its much much more than just the raw technology. I am surrounded by people of great skill and intellect, united in one form or another with a common purpose- the broad purpose of "improving human lives through the application of technology" is one way it could be stated at the company level. But where I sit, it's focused a bit more on the hardware, the people who make that hardware and see having it work on Windows as a means for them to achieve their personal goals [financial, professional, and so on]. We want drivers to work on Windows. We want to make them easier to use. We want that whole end-user experience to be better, safer, and more trustworthy. We want the people who make that hardware and build those drivers find their jobs getting easier and the process more efficient and effective for all. We think about it and talk about it in some form practically every day. Historically, I think a lot of progress has been made, and we aren't resting upon that- we're pressing forward. We strive to improve and achieve some form of excellence.
Better yet to me, though, is that these are people I can trust- those values of honesty and integrity and ethical behavior aren't shams. I see that as well in interactions throughout my day. And I see that respect for diverse and differing viewpoints- it isn't always easy, and in none of this am I trying to say everything is perfect. But it's a good place to work and good people to be working with, and we're in a reasonable sense making our living trying to do good things. In a way, it is living a dream [sometimes the technology turns it into a nightmare, but that's the nature of human frailty- we push our limits, sometimes we have to fall back].
So I'm passionate about my job and about Microsoft. I blog because of this. When I was trying to solve that installation problem in my initial set of articles, I tried to live up the corporate standards in my treatment of both sets of customers [the engineer at the company using our technology and the end users who were experiencing this issue]- the fact that they closely align with my own beliefs certainly helps- but that alignment is what helps drive me. It leads me to take hours out of my day at times investigating other issues, or doing other tasks.
In the first article I wrote over the weekend, this is some background to further explain myself: I spent at least a couple of hours reading megabytes of logs to determine what had happened on an end user machine for another support engineer at a hardware company. It was an experience I'd mentioned before- the problem wasn't just affecting his driver, it had affected others. Somewhere out there what was probably a perfectly good piece of hardware got discarded as useless- it's manufacturer derided as producing garbage. This person's company was in danger of the same thing. The first conclusion was unfair, and the second would have been. That offends a basic sense of justice and fairness I find myself afflicted with...
So I got upset, and I vented. In response, I got this reply. It is capable of ambiguous interpretation, whether deliberately or just through a lack of finesse in English [some of the constructions hint at someone for whom it is a second language- although I am capable of that and worse at times, particularly when tired]. So at first, I opted for the less confrontational interpretation, and simply replied with what was on my mind already, anyway. I'm never at my best when angry, and I try not to let it happen [and to let it pass when it does]. I still need to take some of those more curative steps, but I will get them done.
But at the moment, my inner priorities have me blogging again- in part because of that second interpretation. My deepest and sincerest apologies up front if I have misjudged and was closer to the truth with my first estimation, by all means. But the ambiguity exists, the fire is in my heart, and I shall answer:
Registration on MSDN provides access to useful features- my registration, for instance, let' me update my blog from anywhere. If we intended it as a deterrent, it would be a lot harder than it was. Sites where I've seen this particular bad advice [just delete KMDF] weren't hard to find [and I really don't remember seeing many registration barriers]- but the threads were old, and in my own view, there were better uses of my time than trying to challenge each utterance individually. Of course, all that happened BEFORE I saw those logs and some of the real effects of that advice. Perhaps I should have tried that. But I can't unwind the clock, and the genie is out of the bottle.
As for the quality of my own posts- I know I'm not perfect. People that actually take the time to know me know that about me. But I do know what happens when you remove the KMDF service or delete the binaries, or even stop making it boot start [all of this specifically referring to Vista and above]. I've done all those things in testing it- repeatedly. On multiple machines. My parents have a Vista machine, and I wouldn't do it to them. And I would be every bit as angry at someone who gave them the same advice I was ranting about.
Marketing? I have seen my blog featured for brief periods on the WinHEC and WHDC sites [and in both cases, I found it a bit disconcerting- I'm sure I shall always pale in comparison to Doron, or to Mark Russinovich, and I can easily rattle off many more names- I take it as a rotation of sorts meant to give me some success as a blogger, but how well that chance works out is up to me]. I suppose it's a form of marketing, so point taken. But I can't see yet what's wrong with it- I'm no star, and I doubt I ever shall be.
Sycophants? Doubt I've met any- one can agree with something, even enthusiastically, and not be a sycophant. Contrarian- same thing only flipped around. Both agreement and disagreement have value in a conversation meant to go somewhere and achieve a goal- I see that in my job every day, as well. With all due respect, that seems to be an unfair and dismissive characterization (whether directed toward me or not). Real people do these things- they innately deserve more than being dismissed as stereotypes.
Hiding all Microsoft content from the Internet? Or just MSDN? Or just my own blog? If it's the latter, there are times I'd be inclined to agree- I often denigrate my own work- I can be one of my harshest critics. But perhaps the thought that since its in those indices (that's the proper plural for index, by the way), anybody can see for themselves what a blowhard I am can be a form of consolation. If my incompetence rises to the level of termination, perhaps those indices will save a future potential employer from a grave error. On the other hand, if it was one of those earlier two- that's just totalitarian. If you don't care about the walled garden, don't look. Why be bothered that others do? If the underlying claim is that the content is harmful, I'll just not agree- I used that content at times when I wasn't an employee and didn't particularly like the company or think it was a good thing it held its market position. It may not have been perfect, but it wasn't deliberately harmful [and yes, claims like that are indeed something that upset me- I just don't see a point in wasting time dealing with them- not unless there's something concrete and not just endless assertion, which is all I was presented with here].
But to go back to thinking the best, I can take this again as a criticism of the ineffective nature of my choices in how to blog. It's too hard to separate the good stuff from the rest of my verbage. That is something that I am aware of, and occasionally try to correct. But it's hard for me to not be me, especially when blogging- the act of composition drives itself in these directions.
As my final afterthought I'll go back a bit further- my responses on NTDEV a couple of weeks back were fueled by what seemed to me to be an endless stream of negative criticism, shallow, caricatured stereotypes and unfair, unwarranted assumptions about who and what I and my colleagues are. Calvin Guan was in some ways an innocent- his comment was just the verbal straw that broke the Bob camel's back. I've worked with him briefly and he's not a bad sort at all. But my tone may not have been respectful enough... I did want to counter those opinions though, I felt they delivered a skewed picture [and hence that subsequent post].
So, I'll leave this missive in those indices, and let things fall out as they may. Tomorrow I'll go to work and try in my own way to make the world a better place. I'm lucky to have a place where I can do that, and luckier still to have some people about who really accept that as being part of my motivation [yes, I also like having a place to sleep that's warm, and food, and so forth, too- those are additional motivators]... Beyond that, I'm not sure how concerned I should need to be.
