Now that Screech Powers and Steve Urkel have been off the air for a while, being a nerd is not so bad. They really screwed up the image. It’s OK to be a nerd. Nerds make the world go ‘round. And usually make the most money. With technology becoming a larger and larger part of our daily lives, more nerds are coming out of the closet. I grew up in an area of Los Angeles where peer pressure is immense and showing signs of intelligence is frowned upon so I never thought I could be a nerd. Then I went to a magnet high school (CAMS – Class of ’99 baby!!!) which pulls all the “smart kids” from schools around the city into a huge melting pot of nerdiness. It was a great 4 years and profoundly eye-opening for me because the education system is almost non-existent in my old neighborhood. At this new school, we spent a lot of our free time making fun of each other and seeing who was the bigger nerd. Based on this fun, a friend and I actually planned on writing a book on how to determine if you are a nerd. We never got around to seriously talking to publishers but below are excerpts from our findings. And there is nothing wrong with doing any of these things. I do. We all do. Being a nerd is not just being smart or dressing a certain way. It just is what it is. It’s possible to be a nerd and be “cool”. There are all types of nerds. Some are nerdier than others. Some deny their nerdiness. But if you still don’t know where you stand, you just might be a nerd if…
-your favorite drink is V8
-your favorite TV shows air on public access channels
-your best friend is a nerd
-you know all of the words to the 12 Days of Christmas
-you collect any type of action figure
-you have never been suspended from school or yelled at by some type of authority figure
-you read romance novels
-you have ever accidentally stapled your finger
-you have ever had a roller coaster stopped so you could get off
-you say ‘no pun intended’ when it was actually intended
-you frequently burn yourself when ironing
-you can name all the Brady kids
-you buy books full of Word Searches and Crossword puzzles
-you recycle more than 5 types of items
-you can name all the U.S. battleships
-you accidentally drool while laughing
-you own Weird Al Yankovich albums
-you still own POGS
-you have ever been to a Trekkie convention
-you actually wait 30 minutes after eating before getting into a swimming pool
-you call common substances by their chemical name
-you wait 2 hours in line at theme parks to get on the Log Ride
-you use anything meant to enhance the appearance of a water bottle
-you own a Chia pet
-you know what “e.g.” and/or “i.e.” abbreviates
-you own a high-powered telescope
-your watch has a calculator
-you say ‘gesundheit’ when someone sneezes
-you have discovered a comet
-you were the target of your entire elementary/middle/high school on the last day of school
-you know tropical bird calls
-you hold conversations with plants
-you can name all 7 dwarfs
-you go to the beach to make sand castles
-the moonwalk is your favorite dance
-you watch entire sitcom marathons on holidays
-you make songs with the clicking mechanism on your pens
-you were a girl or boy scout
-you know your state bird, flower, and motto
-you lick the cream off of Oreos before eating them
-you “camp” in your backyard
-you were always the child that couldn’t hit the piñata at birthday parties
-you are scared to get in the express lane at the supermarket with 11 items
-you listen to AM radio
-you have had a crush on a teacher
-you wear neon clothing
-you know all the elements in the periodic table
-you drink 8 glasses of water everyday
-you sew your own clothing
-you think Gatorade makes you a better athlete
-you find another nerd attractive
-you have ever went through a drive-thru on a bike
-you buy gift certificates for yourself
-you always throw up the peace sign in photos
-you haven’t laughed at least once yet while reading this
-you think I’m stupid for writing this
-you have read all these line until your eyes hurt
